Board 8 RAP BATTLE: tha LEAGUE 3 Week 5
The Fifth Week of the Board 8 RAP BATTLE: tha LEAGUE 3 Tournament. ''~Week 5~ Battle 1: Ed Bellis vs Rusty ~The Score~ Ed Bellis: 8 Rusty: 0 ~The Raps~ Ed Howdy y'all, time for a show, grab your dinner and your crockery Here comes the king, he's 4 and oh, gainst RustyMrMokka-ree Gon' flood this fight, so don't complain; they call me Overflow Rusty's born free but now he's chained by the lyrical Rousseau Too late for you to make amends, the rent's too high in Bellis City Want to appeal, just ask your friends – the gays and queens committee Such a pity to get caught in this, but I'm actually quite nonplussed As I iron out your awfulness you'll really become Rust It's victory or bust for you – and boy, my nickname's Buster You really haven't got a Clue – you're yellow, Colonel Mustah That's also cuz you're set aflame, but you're not without your gains I'd stick by you if zombies came, cause boy you've got no BRAAAINNNS. Rusty tha guys at yer asylum dig my lyrical dope but when they read yer verse they be lookin for tha literal rope and since i'm striking hard you've get minimal hope cuz my raps bend you bend n fuck ya up with tha figurative shope cokes you gotta be insane if you think this match is fair critics eat up my shit up like girls do to my butt hair they be reading yer raps but they don't even care since you lost yer last life to my bear calvary tear my surgery made me stronger which gave me smarts tha you lack you gettin eaten by zombies after this kick to yer nut sack ed gonna lose to the messiah since this verse made the crazies less wack with the overkill upon you after this upcoming undead attack Ed You're right about the asylum – only crazies dig your cut In a taxonomic phylum it's Acoelomorpha, lacking gut Please tell me that those actions weren't the best you could procure If this battle were 'bout fashions you'd be simply 'naute couture' 'Messiah''s what you prattle, added emphasis on 'mess' '' If you actually won this battle I would prob'ly convalesce I must confess you are correct in saying this ain't fair Cokes must have simply mixed you up with spam that's half-aware Rusty's pres'dent of Nigeria and I've exiled him en masse I'll serve you like a cafeteria with mystery meat: your ass Alas! You're second billing, the Fitch to my Abercrombie This is a mercy killing because Rusty, YOU'RE the zombie. Rusty are ya sayin' my ass gets more men than i admitted gay man who cares about clothes companies when you are lando to my han solo is how i roll, i'm no joke entry like a certain someone named dan okay he's too good for you time to switch to the backup plan to the backup plan this one will be sure to work since it shall attack with a great white shark schooling you like the good ol' days just like it's the playground park it's time for bed ellis get under the covers since i strike when it's dark rhymez so tight it light ups the stadium with the ultimate lyrical spark just call me electro boy since you can guess my superpower hope you asleep boy you might miss power hour actually just watch me since i'm just as good as jack bauer i may just be a zombie since you just got devoured Battle 2: Colonel Alloy vs Curt ~The Score~ Colonel Alloy: DRAW by forfeit Curt: DRAW by forfeit Battle 3: Aeon vs JC ~The Score~ Aeon: Forfeits JC: Wins by forfeit ~The Raps~ Aeon No fucking with A.A., no ducking plans I'm plotting Justin Crossing's in want of flossing, his skills vanish as his tooth's rotting inch by inch. Victory's a sinch, it's no bold claim, this cold brain I'm facing thinks up raps akin to mold stains. No survival up against my might, a cool wind's racing; A crap rival in my final fight's a comfort that's bracing. I'm casing his past work, no signs of ability Any affray fairly fought is futility; This villain's quick to dispatch, mark the fall of J_C A thrillin' handicap match won with a solitary 'e' JC Now that I've arrived the situation's pandemonium Get distracted, turn back, and by now JC's took the podium Don't expect a pushover, you won't just go owning him You can't defy the fly, into the future I scry I foresee defeat, you're going to dwindle, don't deny It's as they they always cry, Live and Let Die Too bad for my opponent, he's not quite a proponent His word's as brittle as glass, there's no commitment He can't follow through, there's just no way to counter The future will be seen to, flattening Aeon to a flounder He will realize the error, beginning this confrontation Lost as a child in New York deep in Broadway Station Battle 4: Menji vs jdizzy ~The Score~ Menji: 4 jdizzy: 3 ~The Raps~ Menji Lights out in this house ‘cause my rhymes hit switches Make ya’ quick to scream like those freaky adult *****es Came unprepared and that’s what’s makin’ ya’ scared Take my arm ‘cause with no contact you be vision impaired Disability made ya’ lifeless, pathetic, and unenergetic Turn your dead body into one big aesthetic prosthetic Sell ya’ to Old Navy ‘cause they deal with those freaks Put you up on display advertisin’ the best sale in weeks You made the customers double, shocked me like a pop quiz ‘cept you aren’t makin’ them come – storefront sign says: “Watch Menji deliver an ass-whoopin’ to jdizzy for nine-fifty And get a pair of jeans half-off, ‘cause we know ya’ thrifty!” jdizzy Your verse lacks inspiration. it knocked me out my groove. not worth my time to battle someone terrible as you you bout as challenging. as stepping on an ant. or beating up a toddler im afraid that i just cant stoop to your level Im above you like the top floor Your lines pick up pennys nigga they just that poor a bore, I snore wake up and wipe the drool away then demand a refund, matter fact YOU should pay so imma make ya, strip you naked, throw you on the streets Anita baker, like her song, you belong to me you overstepped your boundrys, so imma make you see the folly of pussy niggas thinkin they could step to me Menji My inspiration inspires the system, I’m used by every lecturer I’ve got the rhythm, give ya’ my new groove if ya’ call me Emperor I’m guessin’ you a pacifist if it’s challengin’ to step on an ant you did say you can’t – pay me back but don’t levant ‘Cause those pennies I picked up were sufficient to ya’ worth My rap was unearthed, people gather ‘round like the virgin birth You’re like a fire, people gather until the smoke blows in their face ‘Cause your words are like mace – I’m capitalizin’ on your lower case Like an editor to a shitty writer – I have to fix your mistakes After 24 lines of editing my hands will have many aches But hey, you’ve kept up with me, classify that a miracle ‘Cept I’ll expose your folly – I am lyrically satirical jdizzy They say, the anticipation is better the the act verses known to cause organisms so I cant agree to that rich off the silence its golden as they wait for my arrival Hanging off the edge of there seats like a baptist at revival at this recital, im keynote, without me you would be nothing well without targets i cant shoot So I guess you good for something your lyrics are translucent, Incorporeal and short in stature what i spit evokes emotion, ****** feel me like can--cer Im a dan-cer, you just a ***** last name aint Armstrong so no way you dodging this Write a will and speak your last words cause the ends in sight the answer to your questions yes your executions tonight. Battle 5: Alec vs BBall ~The Score~ Alec: 4 BBallman: 1 ~The Raps~ Alec AlecTrev destroys with poise in ways the crowd enjoys Redefining elite like I'm Dub-E-B Du Bois BBall's background noise, makin' the Pope pro-choice Now unlike the Church I'll seperate the men from the boys Think you can face me? Did your head get knocked? Like John Bobbit you're running round half cocked Barely clocked in and already you're shell shocked Getting mocked and rocked by the lines I concoct I swagger, you just stagger vs my lyrical daggers I'd steal your girlfriend but she's at best a double bagger All life long I've come out strong, you think you can tag along? Then like a weeabo's wet dream, you're totally fucking Rong BBall You think you're on my level I should note that it seems to me, That you forgot you would have lost if Curt didn't vote strategically, You better enact caution, I'm the rap Sergeant, I stay strapped, I attack and stab often, I'm past arson, I'm on to revenge courses, One major assault and you'll fall like French forces, I bench corpses of rappers I battled before this, My skills are worth fortunes, yours get no love like you spit orphans. So now it's time to frag ya, cuz we both know that I'm better, Fuck your swagger and your dagger cuz I brought a Beretta. I'm rightfully conceited, this game I've mastered it, We're both undefeated, but mine's without asterisks. Alec Call me Sam Adams, I'm a damn good decision I'm a cut above like your botched circumcision Prepare for a collision with my vibrant vision I'll make incisions of derision with perfect precision Your rap was an absurd turd, crowd heard every third word Guess your momma likes her babies shaken not stirred, nerd I already slaughtered you, your IQ so low we water you If you were a father I'd have pro'ly nailed your daughter too You're just second best, the rapping Buffalo Bills Emcee George Foreman, I'll get up in your grill Get chills I'm so ill, while you got less thrills than Dr Phil And now you're shitting the bed like you mixed exlax and sleeping pills BBall I thought you were great but that verse can't be forgiven, Your skills are a bigger con than every fucking religion, So fuck this world that you live in, where people are given Credit for verses that surface in prison... as toilet paper for women. Why are you wasting my time we could both do without, That was your worst flowing verse like a brook in a drought, Like a book in the South, you're useless like a girl with good looks and no mouth. You should have stayed quit now you've removed all the doubt, But I'll call you Sam Adams, because I'll be drinking a man's beer, Makes sense since at the end I'll be the last one to stand here, I'll make my demands clear, just give in to your damn fear, You're like a blind kid who just found out that he can't hear. Battle 6: Wigs vs Foolmo ~The Score~ Wigs: Draw by forfeit foolmo: Draw by forfeit Battle 7: Minipooot vs Digi ~The Score~ Pooot: Forfeits Digi: Wins by forfeit ~The Raps~ Pooot I begin my attack spittin' lyrical smack You best follow the leader cause I'm leadin' the pack My words flow faster than speed, gonna smoke you like crack I burn you like high quality weed, till you blacker than black Watchin' you on the ground while you bleed, cause you wacker than wack Poot's ready to feed- heh, you the perfect snack Like a bull into a crowd I came here to gore Gonna put you in a coma, stomp you to the floor Score one for the Poot, and none for the whore I've declared war, cause Digi Digi Digi (what) can't you see Uh Sometimes your words just disappoint me Poot spewin' attacks like a real MC, go home son cause you straight to DVD Digi Yo disses are made up, like applyin’ eyeliner, blacken you like a prize fighter Firefighter - puttin’ out your burns quick, stop, drop and roll on you with a drum-stick in pub-lic I’m rus-tic, call me sputnik, out of this world, upon re-entry I’m a missile like Sidewinder Piledriver - from New York to New Brunswick, pitchin’ a blinder, my raps deserve an uptick That’s right, an uptick, my raps is subject to inflation Supply and demand, you can’t supply, I demand a donation I charge by the word, by the line, by the rap and by appearance You charge for bjs, hjs and your services are on clearance And for every billable syllable I find you more and more killable Awestruck and outstruck, I see now that your blood is spillable. So go ahead Poot and those tight handys'll take ya far Probably a shame that I've seen tighter rappers on a candy bar Pooot Battle 8: Tombolo vs Realo ~The Score~ Tombolo: Wins by DQ Realo: DQ ~The Raps~ Tom I'm up against Realo, and he's sure the real 0 My victory here can't quite be called a steal, oh You don't even know how hard I can go Gonna knock you down so low, 'cuz it's time for my solo. I'm bringing aplomb, attacks with acclaim You're just gonna bomb, like a Balalaika claim Your five minutes of fame will make a nice frame For building my name, while I render you lame Couldn't hack it with Lockes, now you're gonna get cut My UCA career rocks, but War is kicking your butt You're just a weak manslut, forever stuck in a rut And once I'm done with you, your last door will be shut. Battle 9: sbp vs PatsD ~The Score~ sbp: 8 PatsD: 5 ~The Raps~ sbp i'll wax you like a car wash, scrub, you're destined for the scraps pile think you're immovable but i'll just flip you like a klax tile while you trip over your lines we can smell your fear, you're running scared no dice on trying for surprise, like jeremy irons i'll be prepared you think yourself mufasa but like sagat i'm the angry scar my f-a-d-c ultra two will blow you up like sinistar like tetris two there's bombs in it, cacophonous commotion your rhythm is just depressing so i'll blast you back, a blues explosion stuff a cellphone down your throat and make the call to wring your neck i'll rip your guts out, have a look, and bill you for the belichick so flee for safety, patriot, go running back to take a knee you've la-le-lu-li-no shot at my philosopher's legacy PatsD I was gonna take it easy on you then you dissed my namesake Forget 'bout sharin' Cheez-its, mon, you got me pissed in eight ways You call yourself a legacy, forget that I'm a Dynasty? Your reign had ended long ago, today I'm at my finest peak. I'll piss a verse magnificent, you just crapped out a stinkbomb You wish you were this mischievous, you can't teepee a wigwam You call yourself the baddest cat, but pussy you ain't my brother. Can't wait to see the kids you have, you fuck your nephew's mother I threw it back to you real fast like Digi did to topple ya Watch out, hyenas at your back, they're itchin' bad to gobble ya You top the power rankings, but you're on a losing streak I'll be banking on this spanking to be cruisin' to three-peat. sbp of course you're talking cheez-its, you're the biggest cracker on the board acting all salty, flaking out, you're on the f-ritz heading toward bankruptcy when my premium plus taxes kills your cash reserves you'll try to play our heartstrings but you only get on people's nerves can't even garner votes out of charity, folks'll pass on through nobody wants t-risc-uit if it means they might be seen with you you're flopping like a goldfish, your face flush with recognition that you're out of your depth against the league-leading rhetorician here's a ticket for the show of hands so you can finally see applause your dynasty was sadder than those freaky inbred habsburg jaws and history will only laugh when your case is presented because failed campaigns like yours are why the footnote was invented PatsD You call me the biggest cracker, then you rattle off Nabisco Seems like yer whiteness tracker had a little of a miss, no? Don't worry, once you crumb-le I'll just sweep you away I ain't that blind or fuckin' humble, launch my feet to yer head. I'll fuckin' punch yo teeth out, you better go and get the gauze Don't even try to speak out, you're flowin' worse than menopause I'm high with the times, call me a billy-in-air. Or do it cuz I'm valued at a million heirs My rhymes are well-done man, yours aren't even medium rare The name's Johnny Rappleseed cuz I re-ceded yer hair With my lines, now it's time, for the voters to decide Which was better, yer White Cheddar, or my homicide. Battle 10: AID vs Extha ~The Score~ AID: Wins by forfeit Extha: Forfeits ~The Raps~ AID why does the title say me versus extha? you might want a lesson but this can't be a battle if you wanna be trained buy a bra, I don't offer sessions in the profession of prattle I’m a terminator, not an educator, can’t teach this fool to ''spell nomenclature much less to use words to endure my furious flurries of lyrical forces of nature 'cause I spit typhoons into monsoons and rise the world’s tides like twin moons coolin' pools of molten ooze to brew volcanic flues while you drool into spoons forget fingers like prunes, I leave bone-deep tattoos in black and blue hues they spoil future news that a flash-forward-flood chugs your pitiful dews ask a sleuth - the bruises I drew are clues that you lose, soothsayin’ previews of truth for the newborn babe with less tooth, from the new Babe with less ruth. that's no lion - my keyboard just roared, now let's hear your mouse squeak better cheat and repeat me, the only lines I can't beat are mine from last week. Battle 11: RTB vs Stan ~The Score~ RTB: 8 Stan: 0 ~The Raps~ RTB I can tell that you can’t rhyme, this match’ll be a landslide, Give you some lyrical jail time based on your failed lines When I teach the ways of rap I unleash the rage I have I’m a beast untamed who attacks and speaks and slays you hacks Who seek to claim wins with crap so meek it fades to black While I breach and maim and scrap your weak and fake fool raps. Stan, check my ability, there’s no civility to my hostility My capabilities seem like an impossibility. Such endless volatility When I pen this, you can’t mend this damage from my lines Stan Watch as my disses dismiss, it’s remiss of your flow to be so dry man. It's a spectacle, your best lines I’m dwarfin’ because yours fester with boredom, you're as detestable as a third trimester abortion or molester of orphans. Stan A long song played in a throng Guess I just proved you wrong. Ya say you’re a teacher but you’re preaching to the choir Speaking Greek - need a cipher - nothin’ but a rhymer For your boasting - I wasn’t scared in the least I’m Kraven the Hunter to your “untamed” beast. Yeah - that’s me making your heart throb Cause I’m swan diving like it’s my job. As I pen this, I can’t help think how weak that attack was Because I saw and really did dismiss it - like a fly’s buzz Get me a coat hanger cause I’m hanging RTB to dry Or maybe take a trip to the back alley and make ‘im cry. RTB Your poetic technique is pathetically meek and aesthetically bleak You’re as frenetic and weak as an obese diabetic that can’t eat So cease the fight and at least I might decrease the spite With which I write to win outright and leave you deceased tonight. I’ll be the judge at this trial in which Stan’s style is reviled There’s no denial you suck when no wins are compiled in your rap battle file. I murder with diction of unheard-of-conviction like a muted court sentence My words have inflicted an absurd affliction and there’ll be no repentance. They’re approving me as the winner, and it’d be insane if they said you aptly fought I’m proving you’re just a beginner, you’re an inane runner-up: just an afterthought. This lyrical display proves my rhymes are gold, yours are tired old shit, son. A miracle array of lines to spoil your ancient old ass: call me the end of disk one Stan Tumbling over and over in a wordy gyre Your situation has suddenly turned dire Aspired and desired to be a rap battler Mired by what transpired now you shatter. Mock my record all you want But you’ve got nothing to flaunt For you the playoffs are barely in reach Now don’t that just sting like a beach? I’m accused of being an ancient beginner - are ya confused? Did you mean to bruise or abuse me - cause I’m just amused. This thread’s over no matter how much ya pled or said Cause the final message is clear: disk could not be read Battle 12: Mer vs WC ~The Score~ Mer: 6 WC: 0 ~The Raps~ Mer I got fightin' words to substitute two fists, Your rhymes bitin' turds, I leave a bitch toothless, I'm ruthless, leave you paralyzed and useless, Your chance at winning disappear like Doopliss, You know, Dub-C tries, he can' be me though, His rhymes just waste my time like TVTropes, You're wanted less than a Brokencyde CD, bro Tell him like John Cena, CAN YOU SEE ME? No. I bring the thunder, Rap God, you can call me Odin And man, I ain't even gotta try to own it, Here's my verse, almost fell asleep as I wrote it, Someone wake me up when I have a real opponent. WC The real challenge of this rap is avoiding the modhammer If I use the disses I’m thinking I’ll be in the gamefaqs slammer Your rap was delayed cause you were at the monster ball Yall proud of being freaks, and you made the right call You think you’ve already got this match wrapped up But your rap is like the script of two girls one cup I honestly have no clue how you won twice I’m about to put you already slim playoff hopes on ice I could tell you were falling asleep as you wore that shit You don’t deserve a single vote, you are fucking unfit This match shouldn’t have been extended for you Cokes should have stepped in and given you a DQ Mer You're pathetic trying to pass that shit off as a rap, Once I read it, had no doubt this thing was a wrap, I get claps while your rhymes get smeared like a pap, You're a 3 to 4, like when I might take a nap, I'm a straight 10, don't mention the irony, I'm essential like Iron and Vitamin E, You ain't Vitamin C, no Graduation, From the Battle High School where we're magic makin', You're the unwanted guest, like menstruation, They hear my shit and Crank it like Jason Statham, You know the voters'll be typing out my name, right? I pack more lines than Kate Moss's Friday night. WC You tried to compare yourself to important vitamins Judging by that crap I think that you’re just on heroin All you got there is lame pop culture references Here’s where I would put a joke about your sexual preferences This battles is a soccer match and I keep scoring goals Running all over you hurts, I need Doctor Sholl’s You ask me to get at you but I’ve already gotten At the end of tha league, your raps will quickly be forgotten I could stop right now and leave the next 3 lines blank The voters can surely tell your raps must be a prank No human being could write verses that damn poor Leave at the door your false illusions of grandeur Battle 13: Boko vs Chrono ~The Score~ Boko: - Chrono: - ~The Raps~ Boko take it away bokes, it's time to run the show flow that i can bestow - a lyrical k.o. can't escape your b.o., cos you got majin on the mind possess the likes of you, confined and now you're blind inclined to but i'm kind, won't destroy you quite yet teach you a thing or two, general to your cadet like a bull i'm dead-set, ain't nothing slowing me down you were caught red handed, scum tryin'ta lynch town in my puddles you will drown, my skill's above your level defeat i'll likely revel, send you down to the devil while i sit atop my throne: now alone, you ain't nothin' but a dirty tombstone Chrono Story time, gather round, Tell you what's going down Stop, now what is that sound? The screams from a masked town. I'm like the Nemesis, out for your heart, sending you a valentine. Was over at genesis, you fell apart, at the very start of time. A moment of quiet on top of a hill. Then Fluttering from above breaking your will. An omen of death, blood colored butterfly. Your very last breath, three points before you die. Dreamers keep on thinking there's a chance in hell. Gotta stop believing, cause you know damn well. No Antidote, no cure, get that in your head. Monsters make real sure, you'll be left for dead. Boko take THAT away bokes, that story made me dry heaves you like a horse, diseased and you're awry teased you like you're fry, not quite the sharpest in the box rampin' with a chrome mox, you always imprint ****s. board eight flocks to my decree - presence makes you flee but i outrun, racin' you like my girl's trixie i'm not outgunned, snipin' you like i am MC. you're gonna need a genie - wish that you were me and so you see where i'm at, square me and you get e energy, nearly free, of the dyne variety heavenly, above you as if i were a god while you're stuck down in hell giving high fives to the todd. Chrono You act like a king, but you're nothing but a bad joker. The cards always brings a girl who screams for me to "fuck her" Bet your followers would stick by you to the end. But your castle crumbles brick by brick, Armageddon. Law of the land, it's rebellion, against the power. The master plan, sense of treason, your last hour. Wizards can incant a spell but at my sound they stop. Warriors can raise some hell, but at my words they drop. Out of fear shut your doors, kingdom ready to fall. Not a spear, not a sword, Chrono's rhymes wreck all. You lost your bet, your castle, and soon your life Now I'm all set, no hassle, to put you on ice. Battle 14: DC vs Seg ~The Score~ DC: 12 Seg: 0 ~The Raps~ DC Battlin' me and wanna win? Pray to the powerful mod in the skies. Packed with so much punch you'd think you met a four armed God in disguise. My metaphoric lines will shine and dry out your soggy and lame attempts to - Unseat me from the throne I own - Seginus, it's time to end you. My dominance is obvious, you're novelist when droppin' scripts. What I jot and pen on monoliths'll leave you positive that God exists. Pompous? shit, that's modest, kid - my accomplishments astonish men. Gynecologist's comment when this Segibitch is loggin' in. My consciousness revolves and spins - constantly on consonants. Monstrous with a polished spit - I'm BBall, Giggs and sonic mixed. Enthrallin' the populace while demolishin' your rotten writs. Expose your sloppiness when squabblin', there's no way that you're toppin' this. Seg I'm in for rammin my rhymen through dc's rappin hymen I clock in, my glock on his deadline, alarm chimin I'm a timesplitter and I spit bitter vitriol, bitch get real he feel the itch as the fans drop in and hit the shit he spiel on this deal the devil got gypped, I throw in the sack and spit-seal the crypt leave a dilated ghost-ridin backseat in a black whip a deceased flagship dumped on the great river thames "dc's a hell of a chump" mused the late ricky james chemist's spirit sickly maimed and screamin for momma witch doc's autopsy reads "lyrical blunt force trauma" cops at the scene with a mother in tears, I'll have her gonna peen her in the rear over dc's cold, dead cadaver Battle 15: Me Pie Three vs Cokes ~The Score~ Me Pie Three: 0 Cokes: 4 ~The Raps~ Me Pie Three Not a huge coffee guy, my dogs drink cokes in da morning, But today they get none, cuz this can's freezin' up and explodin'. Ya shits so low quality, rather do that ice than a coke, The drug methodology makes ya stuff seem less of a joke. But ya pokin the alpha with a twig cuz you know that I'm in beast mode. Woke me, now it's eat mode, suck ya brains out tween my teeth, cold, But my packs got a thirst, so I sick em on ya like Zerg rush. Gut ya, divin in rough, so quick they blurred, MUSH! CRUSH! STORM! SWARM! Haha, ya flow needs form bro, I'd like ya cubed, On thin ice, cokes, and you'll be drowning reliving this stuff, looped. Try to climb up and I'll just go in hypermode, MP3s got tons of phazon, now ya blaze on, cuz I got ya by the lymph node Cokes That rap was so bad I nearly had a mental breakdown I've never read rhymes so nonsensic'lly opaque, wow Like Michael J Fox, you're about to feel a shakedown Splash some water on your face, make sure you're awake, clown: You're fucking horrible, you shouldn't have been a replacement You rhyme like you've spent your life locked in someone's basement Your command of the language rivals that of the cavemen You're so stupid, people stare at you in amazement You prob'ly wake in the morning and wonder where outer space went Truth is, it ain't half as much as the space between your ears If you could comprehend this, you'd already be in tears But fortunately for your ego, your brain is in arrears Me Pie Three Simple's only good if I can take a good nap Now that I'm well rested though I'm spittin hood raps All I see are excuses, like why ya dick's three inches Can't screw *****es because they see the bust in yee britches Misses be laying me with kisses but this kinda bliss is Amiss wit you, unliss ya take revatio for ya sistas Ya verse is matches ya dick though, they bore me Rehearse, or you'll be kicked out before we Even finish, but you're used to that, surely Can't even **** while you're jaying off to furry Can't even whizz through Sonic, gettin' Es on easy Can't even fizz, cokes, cuz your flow's all leaky. Cokes Something in the way you rhyme revolts me like no other rapper Without a doubt I'm about to put your lights out like the Clapper You wanted a good rest, now I'm making you a dirt napper You don't seem to understand how to speak coherently Can't read your verses unless I got a lotta beer in me Deforestation, cuttin' down MCs like I'm clearin' trees I've taken down Cali redwoods, but you ain't even a pine The people opine that your lines can't even come close to mine So naturally gifted, I don't need twelve, I can beat you in nine Battle 16: Giggs vs Swordsman ~The Score~ Giggs: 5 Swordsman: 3 ~The Raps~ Giggs I'll end this shit in record time, spit my words and then flee the scene Swordsman found dead by the second line like a murder in New Orleans Giggs come so hard Americans just don't get it, like dark aeons With a rush of adrenaline, turnin' poets to kids with crayons 'Cos this flow **** is like hardened cement, you just can't kick it Settin' in motion unfortunate events, bitch, call me Lemony Snicket I cause schisms like VFD, seduce your friends and your girl Giggs the cataclysmic MC - I'll induce the end of your world You're so skill-less it's outrageous, man, your plight is hopeless Best hope my illness is contagious, spreadin' pandemics of dopeness Swordsman shunned like a pariah: half-steppers fester, slain and shot And in the ground you'll expire, 'cos rap lepers never change their spots swordsman Hit like Smirnoff and limes, leave ya buzzin’ like hive mind Suckin queers off for dime’s the only time you earn a head-line Your cement flow is too slow, I’m Sonic in an enzo It’s like you’re Em on benzos, too fucked to attend shows. Presidential, JFK flow cause my fire’s everlasting Don’t try to say you’re Oswald cause I know your ass aint blasting So light it up, I did inhale to put it bluntly The people love me, I’m a savior to the country Even conspiracy theorists say it’s crazy you’re above me. This is a massacre, ending faster than the Bay of Pigs disaster did Lyrical rapture, call the pastor cause ya cold and stiff as plaster wigs No miracles for bastard kids, this missile crisis is the end of Giggs. (nuclear launch detected) Giggs Yo Giggs be racin' through your ghetto, negro, causin' rap shenanigans Displacin' you like Leno, ego bigger than Zapp Brannigan's Such a turnoff yet you're moistened, what I spit addicts like sex But swordsman's Smirnoff rap is poisoned like this shit's predictive text 'Cos man those rhymes were more top-heavy than that wench from Seventh Heaven Swordsman 12 left on the bench, you couldn't make the first XI This match is a sham, even in your head you can't outrap me, yo Just catch me if you can like I'm gingerbread or Di Caprio Submit to the rap zeitgeist; Giggs' words always carry gravitas This ****'s like tryin' to fight Christ, absurd even for your backwards ass Play-offs ain't wired in your journal so you'd best howl farewell 'Cos Giggs ensured your fire will burn eternal from the bowels of hell swordsman If I’m in rappin hell then you’re still trapped in purgatory Seven layers deep enactin’ violence on MCs before me. More fire than a crematory, I spit demonic sonnets Rip chronic then I rock shit while you cough hits, you aint ill bitch— that’s pneumonic Blend rappers into dog bits, hear the 9s click? Verbal bullets leave your mind split but both sides advise “quit!” cause Sword has got that sharp wit. Punches slaughter like Gitmo water, kill you on the board Award you with my notes and still couldn’t hit a chord. My malevolent rhymes are refined by intelligent design while your irrelevant lines say less than a mime. Clear as black and white, Giggs lacked the might to stop my track to playoff lights Crushing mics in this unfair fight, you other rappers better check ya sights! See Also * Week 1 * Week 2 * Week 3 * Week 4 * Playoffs * Back to the Standings and Results page Category:Board 8 RAP BATTLE